GRRRRRR... a rant

You ever hit that crossroads in your life where you look back and think "What the hell did I do?"  Boy have I. I'm starting to regret most of the decisions in my life which is something I've never had to deal with. I'm stuck at a crossroads where everything is at odds with each other, no one understands, and I really just feel like taking the shortest route over a cliff, laughing while I sail down. This is by no means a metaphor for suicide, so don't over react. I only mention it because it seems like EVERYONE is overreacting lately. I mean the sudden need to take the plunge without looking. To take the huge leap of faith. To tell everyone and everything to fuck off and flip them off as I dive over the edge of the unknown. So why don't I do it?? What if what I find at the bottom of that cliff is worse than what I left behind.

To say my life has been a story of "Out of the frying pan..." is an understatement. Few times have I taken that plunge and found myself in a better position. Still, decidingly rare that they are, I'm surprised Murphy, the Fates, and whatever Gods that run things have allowed that much positive movement in my life. Some people spend their lives trying to avoid death at all costs. Fuck it, I'm living life the best way I can and when the fuck in the hood with the scythe shows up, I'm going to throw my arms wide and say "FINALLY". That's how I plan to live. Will it happen, who knows. I'm guessing probably not. I'll probably chicken out again and what some more until there's not enough room left to get a running start before the leap and I'll just end up bouncing down the jagged sides... *sigh* Such is life...